Preparing to live with aging parents?

Your parents are not getting any younger.

And you’d like to keep them out of a nursing home. Or perhaps, they want to continue enjoying their family while they can.

And so the choice is clear: your parents will be coming to live with you.

How do you prepare for something like this?

What can you expect?

In today’s post, I will share how you can prepare emotionally to live with your parents in their old age.

How to prepare emotionally to live with your aging parents

Discuss your differences openly

The reality is that we are all individuals with personalities as different as each snowflake in a snow storm.

This is important to come to grips. It is common for children and parents to butt heads about opinions and how things should be done.

Secondly, you and your parents come from different eras.

The ways things were done in the 60’s is very different from how it’s done now. It doesn’t always necessarily make a thing right or wrong.

And so having an open discussion with your parent or parents about these differences in tastes, personality and choices is something you might want to do before and during the time your parents live with you.

Settle past squabbles

Life is hard enough.

Add in a constant quarrel or unresolved matters and it gets even more complicated.

Almost every person on the planet has had a disagreement with their parents that didn’t go well.

If your parents are coming to live with you, now might be the time to hash the issue out and let forgiveness reign.

This sounds that a lofty goal but I promise it will reduce a lot of stress once you’re living with your parents.

Speaking to a counselor may help in some instances.

Talk about money

Do your parents have outstanding debts to pay off?

Do they have money in a retirement account?

Life insurance? Assets you don’t know about?

Now may be the time to talk to them about finances.

It’s important to know about all of these for several reasons including:

  • These finances could help pay for certain home care and medical needs your parents have. This will reduce financial stress on you.
  • If your parents have outstanding debts, it will give you the opportunity to talk to them and perhaps the financial institutions involved on a how to resolve it.
  • If there are still bills your parents are paying off, it will help you and them make decisions when it comes to paying those bills.

Health conditions

If your parent is coming to live with you with a medical condition, this is something to prepare for as well.

Cognitive disorders like Alzheimer’s Disease and dementia can take a serious toll on family members.

Educate yourself as much as you can on the condition your parent has.

Look in your community for resources like support groups for people who are dealing with similar conditions.

Looking for community resources can also lead you to find resources that will help your parents as well.

For instance, you may find an adult day care center or a service that offers respite so you can take time off for yourself.

Take it one day at a time

Remember the phrase: Rome wasn’t built in a day?

Well, it is true of many situations and preparing to live with your aging parents is one of them.

When you walk into a new situation, realize that things could be difficult at first.

However, as the days go by and you get better at caring for your loved one and hiring the necessary help as needed, things will get better, overall.

So give yourself space and time to grow into this new situation of living with your aging parents.

Did you find this post helpful?

Share it with someone as they prepare to live with aging parents.