If you’re a caregiver, then you’re no stranger to stress.

The pressure of taking care of an elderly loved one who has a chronic illness causes stress.

And the cost of making sure your loved one is getting the best care possible can be stressful as well.

But perhaps you are the person who experiences more stress than most.

Is this because you are not “strong” enough?

As it turns out, a recent study shows that some people are more susceptible to stress.

How come?

Why some people may be more susceptible to stress

In the study I quoted above, the researchers exposed mice to a source of stress for 10 days. One group was considered “susceptible” while the other group was considered “resilient”.

After this, the scientists noticed that one group of mice avoided social interaction. And there was another group of mice kept interacting as normal.

When they looked into the brains of these mice, they found that while a group of brain cells called glial cells were normal in the mice that kept interacting, there were changes in the glial cells of the mice that avoided social interaction.

Very interestingly, it turned out the glial cells in the second mice had reduced amounts of a substance called myelin which is very important when it comes to brain cells working properly.

Caregiver stress: what does this mean for humans?

What could this research mean for humans?

While human beings and mice are vastly different, this study is important for a few reasons.

First of all, it shows us that people who have been exposed to multiple stressors over and over again are more likely to feel the effects of stress more than someone who hasn’t been through the same amount of stress.

Now, you’re probably saying “Gertrude, we knew that! That’s what’s called PTSD”.

And you would be absolutely right.

But until now, scientists did not have a biological reason to tie to PTSD.

With this research, scientists are beginning to uncover more about the biological basis for why some people get stressed easier than others.

And so, if you find yourself more stressed out as a caregiver because of a lot of previous stress, you now know that there might be a biological reason for all you’re feeling.

If this is you, continue to take care of yourself so you can take care of others and make sure you’re getting the help you need.

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If you’ve read our blog long enough, you know we are advocates for caregivers.

Around half of all the content we put out is to help you as a caregiver provide your loved ones with the best care.

But let’s be honest, even human angels like you make mistakes sometimes.

And in today’s post, we are going to raise those issues; because ultimately, we want you to be the very best caregiver there is.

Three mistakes you might be making as a caregiver

You don’t take care of yourself

An empty vessel cannot care for others because there is nothing to pour from.

This is why we’re adamant here about taking care of yourself as a caregiver.

There are a myriad of ways to take care of yourself so that your loved one can be enriched and you can read more on self care for caregivers here.

But here are a handful of thoughts for you.

• Realize that you’re not a superhuman. You are amazing by all standards but you cannot do it all. Give yourself grace.
• Talk to a mental health professional. It is not easy to care for a loved one with dementia. Especially since you may have seen how sharp and quick-witted your loved one was before dementia set in. Therefore, give yourself permission to talk to a mental health professional so you can understand your feelings.
• Get help! If you live in the Greater San Diego area or in Orange County, Green Tree Home Care is happy to assist your loved one with all their needs so they can continue to live in their home. Give us a call today.

You haven’t hired a fiduciary for your elderly loved one (or helped them get one)

If you live far away from your loved one and they have financial assets that need managing, you should hire a fiduciary that will help them manage their money.

Money mismanagement is a common reason why families have quarrels that last for years.

Hiring a fiduciary is helpful in preventing these.

Start the conversation on this early before it is too late.

You haven’t looked for free resources that may be available to you

Although there may be a lot of bureaucracy involved, there are a number of free resources that you and your loved one could take advantage of.

Websites like eldercare.gov are good in helping you find these resources.

 

So are you making any of these caregiver mistakes?

The good news is that any day is a good day to rectify them!

What is perineal care?

And why should you care about it as a caregiver?

In today’s post, I will share why perineal care for elderly adults is important and how to perform this care as a caregiver.

What is perineal care?

The perineal area or the perineum is the area of the body that surrounds a person’s genitals and anal area.

It is an area that is in the rough shape of a diamond.

Perineal care therefore refers to the care and cleaning of the area especially in people who are unable to do it for themselves.

If you have a loved one who is bedridden and or unable to perform most of their own daily care activities, perineal care is essential for them.

Why perineal care?

• The genitals and anal area are both prone to infections mainly because this is where waste – feces and urine- pass through.
• For a person who has an indwelling catheter, proper perineal care reduces the risk for infection.
• Perineal care also protects the skin around the genitals and anus from breaking down. For bedridden loved ones, the risk of bed sores is high. Proper perineal care helps to keep that at bay.
• Cleaning the perineum helps to keep your loved one comfortable.
• For a person who is bedridden and who is unable to clean their own perineum, proper perineal care represents an opportunity for them to maintain their dignity.

How to perform perineal care

You can perform perineal care as a separate event or during bath time.

Prepare your cleaning materials. You will need:

• 1-2 washcloths (take more if you need it)
• A container with warm water
• Peri-wash products – We recommend this product called Sensi Care. We like that it is unscented and good for sensitive skin. This product from Aloe Vesta is a popular, quality line. We like that this product is rinse free and a foaming blend. Soaps can dry out fragile skin. Peri wash products are recommended for each changing. PeriGiene offers an antimicrobial peri wash for those prone to urinary tract infections or pressure ulcers.

How to perform perineal care

• Make sure to wash your hands first before you start providing perineal care.
• Wipe your hands and wear gloves.
• Provide your loved one with privacy during this time.
• Explain to them you will be cleaning their perineum. If this is the first time you’re doing this, have the conversation and make sure they understand what will happen during this time. Understand that this may be embarrassing for them so make it as comfortable as possible.
• Wet washcloth with cleaning solution that is a comfortable temperature.
• For a woman, wipe from the front of the vagina and back towards the anus. This prevents carryover of feces into the vaginal area.
• For a man, wipe from the scrotum towards the anus. With men, you may need to lift up the penis and the skin around the scrotum to get a proper clean.
• Use a second wet wash cloth if you need to.
• Use a dry washcloth to wipe the area of excess moisture.
• If their sheets need to be changed, this is the best time to change the sheets, so you don’t have to bother them for a while.
• Make sure to wash your own hands after you are done with the cleaning.

Dressing after perineal care

Make sure the area is thoroughly dry before putting undergarments back on. Make sure to use gentle motions and do not get abrasive while drying.

If your loved one wears cloth under garments, we recommend cotton products for breathability. Make sure these garments remain clean and use gentle cleaners to avoid irritating sensitive skin.

Protective underwear or adult diapers offer a disposable option for dressing between peri care sessions.

All products are not created equally and choosing the right disposable briefs helps control UTIs and skin breakdown.

Never double up on disposable adult diapers. We do not recommend using a diaper with a pad inserted. This can cause too much moisture to build up and encourage urinary tract infections, pressure ulcers, and yeast problems.

We like this pull-on brief from TENA because it offers great absorbency while keeping the skin dry. This pull-on brief from Tranquility is for heavy or overnight use. We like it because it absorbs so fast. There is also a tab version of the Tranquility brief that offers the same protection and absorbency.

Our friend Angel did a video showing exactly why the tranquility product is an exceptional choice for overnight use.

After perineal care

It is important to make sure you respect the dignity of your the person.

Pay attention to them if they mention that something hurts and make sure you are performing care in the most comfortable way possible for them.

Full disclosure: We do make money when you click on the product links. First, we appreciate your support and are confident you will love our partners. Second, Angel is a real person who owns a San Diego based incontinence company called Dependable Daughter.

She will answer the phone personally to make sure you get the right product for your needs! We rarely offer links in our articles, but we think this connection is important!

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Your loved one has just undergone a major surgery.

What should you expect as a caregiver?

Your health care provider will give you specific instructions after a particular surgery.

In this post, I will give you a general overview of what you can expect after your loved one goes through a major surgery; like hip replacement or organ transplant.

Let’s delve right in.

What to expect as a caregiver after a major surgery

• One of the things you will find a nurse looking for shortly after a person wakes up from surgery is for them to pass urine. So it is likely that your loved will not be discharged until they have passed urine. However, if you find that your loved one is finding it difficult to pass urine, you should call your healthcare provider.

 

• It is possible that after surgery, your loved one will experience pain when they cough. One of the ways to help to make this bearable to have your loved one hold and hug a pillow to their chest while they cough. So keep a pillow close by.

 

• It is common for people to feel very tired after a major surgery-even after discharge. During this time, make sure your loved one is getting all the rest they need. If you have a full-time job, you may need to enlist the help of others. You could get friends and family or hire a professional caregiver to help your loved one during this time.

 

• It’s important to keep on eye surgical site. Your loved is going to leave the hospital with dressing at the site. The nursing staff will give you pointers on how to change the dressing before your loved one is discharged. You want to make sure the amount of redness and swelling around the surgical site is not increasing. If you do notice that the area is red, painful and oozing white liquid and your loved one tells you they are experiencing fever, you should take your loved one to an emergency room immediately.

 

• And speaking of surgical sites, the dressing should be dry to keep infections away.

 

• Even though your loved one will feel weak and needs a lot of rest after surgery, it is also important that they move after surgery. It doesn’t have to be a prolonged event. Movement is good because it allows the heart to pump blood more efficiently to the legs and arms.

 

• If your loved one still has sutures or staples, it may require that you make an appointment to have them removed.

 

• For major surgeries, it is important for people not to lift anything heavy for at least 6 weeks. If the person had an abdominal incision, it is important that they don’t lift anything above 10 pounds.

These the general things you can expect and look out for after your loved one goes through a major surgery.

As I mentioned before, before you are discharged, you will receive a lot of information from the doctors and nurses.

If you happen to accompany your loved one here, it is important to pay careful attention.

 

May is Mental Health Awareness Month.

As a caregiver, we realize that the responsibility can be tasking on your mental health.

It is therefore important that you take care of yourself as a caregiver.

Over the last year or so, we have written several posts on this blog to help caregivers thrive in their role.

Self-care is important to your mental health.

Here is how you can take care of your mental health during this period of awareness.

Mental Health Awareness Month-tips for thriving as a caregiver

When you are overwhelmed, acknowledge it.

Our culture has come to expect caregivers to be stoic and emotionally unbreakable in their roles.

This is an unhealthy expectation.

As a caregiver, you have to realize that you are a human being.

Indeed, you are a special human being, because taking care of an elderly loved one and all the responsibility that comes with it, is no ride in the park.

However, pretending you are not overwhelmed when you are is a set-up for massive failure.

Admit that you are overwhelmed and tired.

Find somebody to talk about what you are feeling.

Let that person-preferably a mental health professional-help you work through those emotions.

Find out from your employers if they have mental health resources for you

If you work in the corporate world, find out if your workplace offers mental health services.

These services maybe discounted or even included in your benefits as a perk.

If your workplace doesn’t have this, you can find out if your work insurance will cover visits to see a mental health professional.

Look within your local community for mental health resources

Several cities around the United States have local mental health services.

Look them up and use the services where it suits your needs.

Take a break

When you need a break, you need a break.

This is where hiring a professional caregiving service like what we provide at Green Tree Home Care becomes essential.

Don’t do this alone.

An alternative would be to ask friends and other family members if they could give you some help for an hour or two during the course of the week.

This break will help you relax and regroup so you can be a better caregiver.

Get enough sleep

Sleep affects your mental health immensely.

If you are not getting enough sleep, chances are that you are building up stress.

Stress is notorious for being the root cause of both mental health and physical illnesses like heart disease and high blood pressure.

One of the best ways to relieve stress in your life is to get as much sleep as possible.

This might mean getting rid of the television or even going to bed early.

Join support groups for caregivers

Sometimes, knowing that there are other people going through the same experiences is therapeutic.

Find out if your area or an association you belong to (e.g. church) has support groups for caregivers and participate in them.

Release tension by having fun

Caregiving is usually serious business and most people would not find the “fun” in it.

Sometimes, a change in perspective could help to inject some fun into the experience.

And can we all agree that having fun is the best stress-reliever of all time?

 

Taking excellent care of your mental health put you in a better position to provide excellent care.

 

Over the last two years, we have worked really hard to come to you with information-packed posts that will help you become a better caregiver.

In today’s post, I am aggregating our best posts on care-giving.

At Green Tree Home Care, our goal is to provide you and your loved ones with a memorable caregiver experience.

If you need care for your loved one and you live in the Greater San Diego area or Orange County area, we’re just a phone call away.

An so, here are 22 resources that will help you become a better caregiver.

22 Resources That Will Help You Become A Better Caregiver

Taking care of yourself as a caregiver

As a caregiver, you have to take care of yourself. In fact, I argue that if you don’t take great care of yourself, you will find yourself failing in your role as a caregiver.

Not sure how to get started? Here are some posts to help.

Caregiver Self-care-7 ways to take care of your mental health

Caregiver stress – 5 self-care tips for the family caregiver

Loved one in hospice care? How to prepare yourself emotionally.

Moving parents in with you/Discussing home care

Are you in the middle of discussing home care options with your loved one? Or planning to move them in with you? Here are a few considerations to make.

5 caregiver strategies every caregiver should know

How to care for a family member you don’t like –Dealing with a difficult parent or loved one? Learn how to navigate those waters.

When parents move in-Learning to live with Dad again – You may have grown up with them, but people change and life is different now.

5 rules every adult child should consider while living with elderly parents

Private caregivers vs agency caregivers

What to do when your loved one is not eating

Mom is resisting home care-How to ease the transition – The conversation around home care is a difficult one for many. Learn how to navigate it.

Financial issues

Money has the ability to tear families apart. In order to become a better caregiver, you have to know how to handle your loved one’s finances. It is also important that you don’t become a scammer yourself.

Senior Scams-Is your loved one at risk – Learn the signs of senior fraud so you can protect your loved ones!

Financial elder abuse-How to spot it and deal with it

When adult children become responsible for handling parent’s finances

Health Conditions

Learn what is common when it comes to common elder healthcare problems.

Caring for your loved one with early-stage Alzheimer’s – Your loved one can still do a lot for themselves during the early stage of Alzheimer’s.

Dealing with Hallucinations in Elderly People

7 diabetes complications every caregiver should know about

Kidney stones in the elderly-what every caregiver should know

6 Common senior healthcare problems you should be aware of

How to detect signs of dehydration in the elderly

Depression in seniors-what you can do to help

Discharge planning-what to do after your loved one has been in the hospital

Elder Abuse

Know it so you can report it or deal with it.

How to spot elder abuse as a caregiver

 

Want to give the best care you can? Browse this library of posts and we have no doubt that you will.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Alzheimer’s is a progressive disease.

And so it is marked clearly by different characteristic stages.

And as a matter of fact, while there is still no promising cure for the disease, early diagnosis helps the affected to live a more productive life than a later diagnosis.

In this post, I will be sharing 3 tips on caring for your loved one with early-stage Alzheimer’s Disease.

Caring for your loved one with early-stage Alzheimer’s

Most people during the early stages of Alzheimer’s can still do a lot.

They will most likely still be able to work, be involved in social activities and perform activities they have always performed.

However, you might notice that they tend to forget where they have placed items or names of people they shouldn’t be forgetting.

Damage to brain cells will cause a person to forget how to perform certain tasks which might leave them frustrated and angry.

Though these symptoms are subtle, they usually suggest that something is going on.

At this point, it is best to talk to your loved one about going to see a doctor for a check-up.

Tips for broaching the subject

• Tell them that you are concerned and that you would love them to see a doctor with you. Don’t force them. But do harp on the fact that it will be a helpful exercise.
• Be patient with them. Losing your autonomy is difficult and people going through it will be frustrated. Empathize and let them know that you are there for them.

Once you have confirmed with a specialist that Alzheimer’s Disease is in play, here is what you can do.

8 tips for caring for your loved one after early-stage diagnosis

• Help your loved one stay independent for as long as possible. For instance, it is likely they can still dress themselves up. Let them do it for as long as possible. This will give them a sense of well-being and control.

 

• As much as possible, include them in every decision-making process. Make sure you involve your loved one in whatever decision you make. Even though they may seem confused by the details sometimes, including them in the conversation will provide them with a sense of control.

 

• An early diagnosis means you and your loved one can still plan the future together. This is a good time to talk about wills, advance directives and finances.

 

• Put safety measures in place around the home. Here are 21 actions you can take to keep your loved one safe at home.

 

• Remember to be patient and supportive. Remind them of what day it is or which grandchild it is who is visiting. It is important to be supportive and patient during this period. Depression is common with Alzheimer’s. And so if your loved one feels they are being ignored or mistreated because their condition, it could exacerbate those feelings.

 

• Dealing with a loved one who is particularly difficult? Read this post I wrote on navigating difficult relationships.

 

• Take care of yourself as a caregiver. Taking care of a loved one with Alzheimer’s Disease is not easy for anyone. You might go through the stages of grief. Talk to a counselor or mental health professional. If you have a large family network, this is a good time for the family to come together to support. Your needs are important too. Make sure you are caring for yourself so you can provide the best care for your loved one.

 

• Hire professional help as needed. If you live in the Greater San Diego area or in Orange County, GreenTree Home Care is more than happy to help you find the professional caregivers you need for your loved one.

 

 

The AARP and the National Alliance on Caregiving reported that 43.5 million adults were caregivers in 2014.

Although they have not come out with another study with updated numbers, it is very likely this number has increased in 2019.

Out of the 43.5 million caregivers, 34 million were unpaid.

What does this imply?

It says that a majority of caregivers still have to work outside the home in addition to being a family caregiver.

Perhaps you ‘re reading this and you are one of those people who works a full-time job and is a caregiver.

Needless to say, your responsibilities are not a cake walk.

Interestingly, a large percentage of people in the study above stated that they were afraid of talking to their employers about their caregiver roles.

This is a truly sad bit because with that many people providing care for their loved ones, more employers should be supportive.

So how do you talk to your boss about care-giving? How do you get them to support you?

In today’s post, I will share three tips on how to broach the conversation with your employer.

Career and Care-giving: How to talk to your employer about it

Talk about what you’ve already done

Chances are that your employer does not know what you have done so far to help your loved one.

They may not know that you have to wake up at 4am to help your loved one in order to make it into work by 8am.

It is possible that they don’t know that you have an hour commute and the physical demands of care-giving and driving to work everyday is hurting your back.

Whatever your specific challenge is, it is best to lead the conversation with what you are already doing to juggle your role at work and your role as a family caregiver.

Find out if there are programs to support your care-giving role at your workplace

What resources does your workplace provide for people like you who are providing care for a loved one?

This is another great conversation to have with your boss.

Some workplaces may offer:

• Adult day care services
• Opportunities for respite so you can get a break from care-giving
• Support groups
• Counselors
• Resources for workers’ loved ones to help with Alzheimer’s Disease

But you will not know if you don’t ask.

So ask.

Find out about remote opportunities

Another point you can raise with your employer is the topic of working remotely.

We live in a brand new world where working remotely is becoming more and more possible.

Working remotely just 2 days of the week may be more than enough to relieve of the stress of having to rush everyday.

Ask your boss if any such opportunities exist.

Your boss is more likely to give you the opportunity to work remotely if you have already proven to be a valuable worker.

So if you are already doing a good job within the company, it doesn’t hurt to ask.

Other facts to consider

Roping your employers in about your role as a caregiver benefits everybody in the long run.

I am also going to be realistic and acknowledge that not all employers are understanding.

In fact, it’s not uncommon to hear that people have been discriminated against because they are caregivers.

Thus, in opening up about this, it is important that you assess your particular work situation to see if it will be helpful to talk to your employers about it.

 

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